alone.

while reading and learning about such an incredible writer and influence on the world of literature, i discovered a sad bit of information about jane austin.

jane austin. never married. died at age 41.

i would hope that such a sad state of events doesnt happen to me. how sad it would be to be such an incredible writer of romance and have no romance of your own.

http://courtneynhamilton.googlepages.com/home

i want.

i want.i want peace. within. to laugh, loudly, until i cry.i want to be brave. to travel. to have more confidence.to stand alone. to succeed.i want a his, a hers. forever.i want to start over. to leave. get away.i want forgiveness. i want to forget.to be patient. to trust.i want to be a light. to be an example.to follow Him alone. i want what i cant have.i want a place. all my own. comfort.i want freedom from these walls. this pain. this fear.i want joy. happiness. i want to learn.to teach. to bungee jump. to run. to dance.i want to be spontaneous. to sing. to be free. from tears.i want time: to stand still, to speed up, to slow down.i want to love. and be loved. to be enough. to have a plan. to have a dream.i want a porch swing. a swimming pool. a white picket fence. a wrap-around porch.i want to be stress-free. no worries.

self control. i am not sure i have that.

self control is the perception of self and the ability to set up boundaries for that self. it seems that lately i dont have alot of that. i am self-control-less.

romeo and juliet.

is it possible to love as deeply and truely as Romeo loves Juliet, in such a short period of time? their love story lasts only days, yet it has captured the hearts of readers across the world. if anyone was to write my love story for me...it would be Shakespeare. he writes in words a picture of love like never before.

the last thing i want to do.

there are days when i just don't know if i can possibly take another step. i just cant do it. i am past the point of stressed, and into some realm beyond that. work is too much. friends are too much. and school is absolutely too much. the last thing i want to do is sit down and do homework. i just want to crawl under my covers and hide from whatever might be trying to sneak up and overwhelm me any further. but i have to push through it. because tomorrow is usually more promising than the stressful day i am currently encountering at that point.

more than words.

When the storm is raging all around me

You are the peace that calms

My troubled sea

And when the cares of this world

Darken my day

You are the light that shines

And shows me the way

-Leeland

frank.

reading frankenstein has never been a desire of my heart, which means that this week's reading assignment is going to be rather difficult for me to get into. frank has always been the scary guy dressed up for halloween running around torturing little kids. he has always been the character that gives me the creeps, (aside from the veggie tales video "God is bigger than the boogie man," where frank seems to protect jr. asparagus.) anyways, frank is always put in the same category as scary movies, etc...which i am absolutely NOT a fan of. the last scary movie i went to was on some what of a date. needless to say, i lasted all of 15minutes before he was kind enough to ask me if i wanted to leave...and we went back to my house and watched The Notebook instead!

i suppose i could give frank a chance...everyone deserves a chance, right?